With the liberation of Afghanistan, Pets or Food™ has been able to secure a limited supply of the very rare Afghan Hound. This breed of dog has served as both faithful companion and live stock to the Afghan nomads for centuries. We’re proud to offer this unique addition to our catalog.

We have a special limited supply of this rare bird. Bald Eagles make great pets if you have a lot of land for them to live on. Roasted Eagle is also one of the most delicate tastes you’ll ever have. Due to the limited number available, we will only ship one eagle per household.

From the jungles of equatorial South America comes the largest man eating snake known to Man, the Anaconda. Pets or Food™ has formed a relationship with the foremost Anaconda wrangler in Brazil to supply us with an exclusive stock of this incredible reptile. Due to the size of the Anaconda, our free shipping offer does not apply to purchases of this product. Homes with small children should consider the Ready to Eat™ package.

The perfect companion on a long trek or just the right size for a pit barbecue. By popular demand we are only shipping sheep dog live or in a cleaned and skinned Ready to Eat™ package that is perfect for pit roasting. Due to the size, our free shipping offer does not extend to this item.

Pets or Food™ is proud to announce that we have renewed our exclusive arrangement with Russia’s premier furrier to provide freshly clubbed and frozen baby seal meat to American dinner tables! Order now while supplies last!

The Beagle has landed at Pets or Food™! The breed famous for confronting the Red Baron and antagonizing Germans everywhere is now available for discerning animal consumers. Beagles are known for their wanderlust. Once out of sight of their owners, these pups are often gone for good. Which is good news for us! Thanks to their flighty nature we have an abundance of Beagles and offer them to you for a song. There’s not a lot of meat on Beagle bones, so the ready to eat pouch comes with Beagle Brats and bone in roasts. We bet Manfred von Richthofen would love to get his hands on some!

Pets or Food™ has the largest Chihuahua stock in the continental United States. Our Ready to Eat™ Ground Chihuahua is the most popular product for our grade school buyers. Because our customers have made this product such a huge success, we’re offering a 10% discount to all educational buyers.

This is the product for the big dog lover! Our dobermans are bred and raised in wide open spaces producing some of the leanest members of this species. Our live animals come pre-trained to obey basic commands like “SIT”, “ROLLOVER” and “KILL.” The Ready to Eat™ animals include two meaty flank steaks, two full sets of ribs, a rump roast, a luscious breast, and four “drumsticks.”

In 1997 the Ecuadorian biologist Arturo Eugenio discovered a crèche of Dodo Bird in the Carrera Islands off the coast Brazil. Dr. Eugenio has successfully bred the bird, one thought to be extinct, and has entered into an exclusive distribution arrangement with Pets or Food™ to offer the Dodo to American markets. Due to some rather obscure U.S. laws, however, ownership of a living Dodo is against the law. Pets or Food™ can only ship Ready to Eat™ Dodo meet to US customers. Don’t miss this incredible opportunity to discover the taste that led to the Dodo’s extinction!

Our domestic feline stock comes from a variety of sources, including city animal shelters, donations and of course our own farm. All of our feline products are carefully screened for disease and thoroughly cleaned before shipment.

What little girl doesn’t want a cute little duckling on Easter morning? Pets or Food™ has made it easy to bring a smile to your daughter’s face and a meal to your plate. Each duckling comes with a two month supply of our special organic feed, detailed care and feeding instructions, and a Pets or Food™ do it yourself butcher set.

Pets or Food™ is proud to bring this virtually unknown Australian delicacy to Western shores. Feral Cat is a very lean, rich meat with virtually no fat content and no cholesterol. Feral Cat is the perfect food for discriminating palettes looking to lower their blood pressure. Due to the feral nature of this item, we are not offering live shipments.

The rare and enigmatic Giant Schnoodle is a cross between the Giant Schnauzer and the venerable Poodle. The result is a mongrel with a fancy name that tastes great over noodles. As most Giant Schnoodles are prone to take on the less exemplary qualities in their parentage, like excessive shedding and a snooty attitude, most are eventually abandoned or turned over to us to be made into our world famous Giant Schnoodle over Noodles.

Great as pets or snacks while watching the big game. We breed our hamsters in bulk so we’re able to pass on the savings to you! Hamsters are sold by the dozen making this item a perfect gift for the child interested in exploring anatomy or the host looking for a way to spice up a gathering. The Ready to Eat™ package contains hamsters on a stick, our exclusive Texas Pets or Food™ BBQ Sauce and a disposable grill. Prices are by the dozen.

Straight from the sub tropics of Australia comes the yummy, cuddly Koala. Pets or Food™ is proud to offer, for a limited time, a package shipment that includes a 15 pound Koala, 10 pounds of eucalyptus, and handling instructions. Australian Aborigines have long known the delicate flavor of this charming animal. Order one today for your special occasion.

The Komodo Dragon is native to only one place on Earth, the Komodo islands off the shore of Indonesia. There are only 6,000 of komodo dragons known to exist and the giant lizard is considered to be a prized pet and a scrumptious meal by those in the know. Our Ready to Eat™ package contains traditional Indonesian spices and herbs, as well as cooking directions. Live purchasers should consider our economical live hamsters product as food for this product. The Indonesian government has agreed to provide Pets or Food™ with up to three Komodo Dragons per year, order yours today.

The perfect replacement for Squab or Cornish Game Hen at weddings on a budget. The Parakeet has a delicate taste and plenty of white meat. The head chef at Pets or Food™ has a special Ready To Eat™ package available for all you brides to be. Each bird is marinated in a port wine and slow roasted on a spit. All you have to do is nuke and serve! Pricing is by the dozen.

Due to the Swine Flu pandemic, pig breeders across North America (which, incidentally, includes Mexico) have been forced to sell their porcine products at close out prices. Some have even paid US to take them off their hands. Their financial disaster is your culinary boon! Because we have been able to obtain piggies at such incredible discounts, we are offering them FREE! That’s right, FREE! You just pay shipping.

Although the scientific community has determined that you can not actually get Swine Flu from consuming pork products, Pets or Food accepts no liability if you do contract Swine Flu, or any other pig transmitted illness, from any pigs sold to you, by us.

One of the most venomous and rare snakes. Our expert breeders have perfectly replicated their native habitat and been able to mass produce this amazing creature. All live shipments come with five Red King Snake anti-venom ampules. Pricing is by the dozen.

This dog is known for being great with kids, loyal and obedient. The Saint Bernard is over a hundred pounds of muscle and tender heartedness. The meat is pretty tender too! We are proud to offer this fine specimen of canine companionship and culinary fare in both Live and Ready To Eat packaging. The Ready To Eat Saint Bernard comes with a freezer filling assortment of ribs, chops, roasts and steaks. Clear out the SubZero and fire up the BBQ!

The French have long known the culinary joys of the frog! Our importers have selected the largest variety of bullfrog known to man and have arranged to have steady shipments sent up to our processing facilities in the United States. This particular breed is known for its ample legs, perfect for deep frying! This breed is also known for the toxin it exudes from it’s skin, and live shipments are prohibited to states where “Toad Licking” is illegal. Pricing is by the dozen.

This item has recently moved out of our exotics line due to a special arrangement we’ve come to with the government of Mozambique. Our processing plant in Obijalla prepares a regional Spider Monkey Delight dish, flash freezes it and ships it to us on a weekly basis. This is without question the freshest Spider Monkey meat available in the West.

From the forests of the Pacific Northwest comes the Spotted Wood Owl. Pets or Food™ is pleased to be able to offer conservationists and gourmets alike an opportunity to participate in the future of this endangered animal. Our expert animal breeders have managed to generate a sizable population of this species in our livestock habitat in Northeast Oregon. For every Live order, Pets or Food™ will purchase and donate an acre of wilderness habitat for use by Spotted Wood Owls. If you’d prefer to sample the taste that loggers claim has no rival, our Ready to Eat™ package comes complete with smoked Wood Owl, a giblets package, and a gravy pouch.

The Taco Terrier is another rare hybrid dog. A cross between the petite, yippy Chihuahua and the tiny, terrifying Terrier! Grrr! The remarkably racist name did, however, provide Executive Chef Diego Chen some interesting ideas on how to prepare the little bastards. None of us at Pets or Food™ really care for small yippy dogs. However, for those of you who do like your companions on the miniscule size, we do offer this appetizer sized Live.